So it’s great being an iron lifting machine & all that but seriously at times, being a powerlifter sucks!!
#10. Jeans. Oh that’s an awful nice pair of jeans let me just try them on…. Either you’re a great squatter and they don’t fit your quads or you’re a deadlifting machine and your hamstrings are literally like having a pair of Christmas hams sticking out the back of your femurs. Either way, good luck getting em over your glutes. Oh hooray they fit your legs let me just zip em up here… And they look like they fit round the waist of a giant.
#9. T-shirts. You’re a dude, great you’re gonna get a massive core and no matter how lean you are you’re always gonna look fat in a t-shirt. You’re a chick? Good luck getting something that’s for your lats and doesn’t sag in the front.
#8. Callouses. You’re having a great day, everything is going fine then BLAM!! Next thing you blew out a callous you didn’t take care of in time and you’ve a got a fist full of goo and blood and pain.
#7. Random bruises. How’d you get that bruise babe? I dunno, lifting stuff??? In the grand scheme of things not that bad, but your legs are always gonna look mangled.
#6. Hunger!!! Yay! you get to eat lots 🍗🍤🍎!! But you just did an epic squat volume session? Oh let me introduce you to uncontrollable, irrational, insatiable hunger! And you need to cut weight for comp?? Muhahaha 😂😂
#5. Cardio. Oh god, cardio. I mean no-one likes cardio but seriously when you specialise in lifting things 1/2 dozen times at most the prospect of walking/ running/doing anything 10 times or more is truly terrifying!
#4. Traffic. Just did a deadlift day? I hope you’ve got an auto if you’re gonna get stuck in rush hour cause your leg is going to be dancing the tango on the clutch otherwise.
#3. Friends & family…. And their endless need to comment how unhealthy it is to be so obsessed, how you’re going to get injured, and especially for girls how ‘manly’ you’re looking.
#2. Loading bars!! Look at your program ‘that shouldn’t take more than an hour’… HA!!! Enjoy spending the next 45 minutes loading bars!! And the worst bit?? 45 mins of loading bars is cardio!! See #5 😂😂
#1. Non-powerlifters. That’s right the thing that sucks most about powerlifting is everyone who doesn’t powerlift! Between having to explain what you do, to lacking the ability to communicate with non lifters and gym neighbors who don’t understand why the bars ‘simply have to’ slam. Hey if you’re not a powerlifter we don’t hate you tho!! Going to a powerlifting comp is like going to a rock concert.. Everyone is welcome so long as they’re cool!